Floyd Loves Janice: True Love Forever

John, Jenn, Fifi and Bob Cat, off on another adventure!

Monday, October 30, 2006

Update on Q94 Cat Story

1) The Melissa and Sid Show was not on the air this morning. We suspect it is a temporary suspension, as their profile page on the Q94 website still exists.

2) Melissa Chase, the girl co-host, has a MySpace page, and has not commented on the incident so far, (although tons of teenybopper minions have).

3) The previous post has been edited for content. I'm a puss and don't wanna get in trouble with Blogger for objectionable content.

Friday, October 27, 2006

Sigh. Sometimes I really hate my town.

I'm all for free speech and creating "theatres of the mind," but I have to say that this morning when I heard about the Q94 skit where the morning douches on the Morning Used Douche Show (sorry...the Sid and Melissa show) I was so ready to hear the FCC had Howard Stern-ed them into oblivian.

For those who weren't listening (I have to admit I was not- I hate Q94, I've always thought the DJs were pricks, and the music totally blows- my coworker told me about the skit and thought it was real) there was a broadcast where Q94 was trying to see how many helium balloons it would take to levitate a basket with a live cat strapped inside. During the skit, the impression was that the person outside accidently let go of the rope tethering the cat to the ground, and that the mistake was nonintentional. Also, they implored Q94 listeners to drive around the Short Pump area searching for a flying basket with a frightened cat inside. There was mention that a spokesperson for PETA had called lamblasting the radio station, the station manager called them in the office once the broadcast was over, and angry calls from listeners poured in. At one point the DJs told listeners not to call in and vent, because they had to keep the lines open for those with sightings of the cat, basket, and balloons. The impression was given that the cat was missing and possibly in danger When no news broadcasts carried the story, I ended up confirming with a newsroom clerk at one of the local television stations that it had been a hoax. Q94 has issued an apology on it's website, but there appears to be no action taken against the new morning show, who plans to have Kevin Federline as a guest next week (which, one could argue, is definately more obscene than a skit implying animal cruelty.)

So.

1) As I've said, I've always hated Q94, and I listen to Elliot In The Morning. I've listened to clips of M&S, and boy did this suck out loud. Elliot could make this show his dirty meth-smokin' beatch.
2) I hope they did piss of PETA, and PETA goes to Clear Channel offices on Basie Road to pelt them with fauxblood waterballoons. (PETA people- it's spelled B-A-S-I-E, and it intersects with Count Road. I'm not making this up. This is how lame our town is.)
3) I am hoping such douchery gets their asses fired.
4) Anyone wanna go over to Clear Channel and launch balloons? We can chant something PETA-esque, like: "Vegan power! Aminal justice! Hey hey, ho ho, Melissa Chase is a cat hatin' ho! and "Animals rule, humans drool?"

Who's with me???

Monday, October 16, 2006

The Notorious Betty Page

We rented The Notorious Betty Page last night, which is an HBO original film starring Gretchen Mol (a dead ringer for our favorite pin-up) and is about Betty Page's career, up until the time she stopped modeling and became Born-Again. Very cool and a sort of different perspective, as Betty Page has defended her career despite her beliefs.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Wade Pilloud is a Giant Cat Killing Douchebag.

This article really made us both mad. If you live near this guy in Indus Minnesota, please egg and T.P his house for us. I hope he goes to jail and the biggest dude there is a major cat lover, and many painful bitch poundings become commonplace.

Friday, October 13, 2006

We watch game shows. There- we said it.

Question: How great are Deal or No Deal and it's compadre, the brand spankin' new One Vs. One Hundred?

Answer: They both rock so hard!

Anyhoo, we are very into the dynamic duo of game shows this fall. We started watching Deal a bit last season- for some reason, we fell for it when one woman got cocky, and blew a wad o' cash for a measly 25 grand. How like life. A bad night on Deal is when someone wins less than $99,000. That is why it's so great. Also, it's funny to watch Howie Mandel, who has really bad O.C.D., go out of his way not to shake hands with people. Awesome.

One Hundred has somewhat complicated rules, but it has Bob Saget and Jeopardy! Grand Poobah Ken Jennings- a combination that's pure genius. We got really excited when the bouncer walked away with over a hundred grand. We may never go out again on Friday nights.

Seriously, NBC has kick arse programming this year. The new show with John Lithgow and Jeffery Tambor is really fun, and we both liked 30 Rock, and of course, Heroes. I also think Meredith Viera was a perfect choice to replace Katie Couric on the Today Show. I'm gonna keep watching!

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Weighty issues

John has lost 24 pounds, and Jenn has lost 20!

So far, a success.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

They Should Just Call That Show "Big Fat Jerks."

DISCLAIMER: This is my opinion. Don't send hatemail if you don't agree. Thank you.

It's no big (pardon the pun) surprise to our friends that we are in the process of losing weight. About 6 weeks ago, we found a wonderful registered dietician named Sharon, who meets with us in two to three week intervals to monitor our progress. So far, it's really amazing. We've lost over 30 lbs collectively, and we're eating better, moving better, living better. We're absolutely proud as punch of ourselves.

So, we decided to finally bite the bullet and end our reality television boycott and watch The Biggest Loser. We have the book, and it's a friendly little weight loss manifesto, and I've seen one or two episodes of the Special Edition where the families team up and lose weight together, and I have a soft spot for Trainer Bob, so we'd figure it would be cool, we'd get some weight loss tips, and maybe find a favorite Loser to root for as the season wore on.

Weeellll....meh.

Okay, in case you don't know, The Biggest Loser involves two teams- a red team, and a blue team. Each team has to work out, diet, bond, and hopefully lose weight together. At the end of each episode, each team member weighs in. The team that loses the least weight must vote someone off. It's like Fat Survivor.

This episode, the two teams were competing on a cruise ship. The main challenge was that they had to deliver trays of food to a certain "passenger" who just happened to be a member of their family. But, there were also other passengers on board, some of whom were elderly. I remember seeing at least two competitors snapping at passengers "outta my way!" while pushing past. One competitor, named Heather, actually screeched throughout the ship's spa "I NEEEED A SIIIIGNATURRE!!!" before finding her husband.

Heather and her co-horts, Pam and Kai, have openly told others that they want a female to win. When the red team fails to lose weight and therefore have to eliminate someone, there is the typical bedroom shots of the three red team shrews plotting to eliminate a male team member, and they approach another team member in an attempt to oust this other competitor. My stomach sunk.

The sad thing is, when the red team was screwing each other over, they were crying fake reality tv tears while proclaiming their love for their team and that this experience was so difficult and yet, so gentle. Bullshit. It got so that I actually enjoyed watching their fat asses struggle with the workouts. Their intense pain made me happy.

Basically, the Biggest Losers are just that- these are the worst kind of people- they paint themselves as victims because of their weight, but really they are just as venomous as the skinny gold digging crackwhore on the other reality show. With B.L., there is just more of them to hate. Fucking reality tv.